It is with great sadness and a heavy heart that I have to report the untimely death of Wolfgang IV, much adored mascot of Malt Liquor Tech Racing. It seems Wolfgang was squished, like a large packet of ketchup, on NC highway 33, near the farm of Rev. Alonzo Graham Taylor III esq., an investigation is under way.
Travis Wilson, team principal of MLT Racing, said there will not be a Wolfgang V. “The loss of all these mascots is just too much, we cannot go on”. The Road Atlanta NASA race weekend in December will be the last race for MLT Racing and will be dedicated to the memory of Wolfgang IV. “We will probably do a lot of drinking and telling of tales about Wolfgang” said Wilson. “Hopefully there will be some women there to console me” said Taylor. When asked about the fate of Wolfgangs I, II, and III, the pair was ellusive. “Wolfgang I jumped from a moving vehicle” said Wilson, “or he may have been pushed”. It was reported that Vic Hall was seen driving the vehicle in question. Wolfgang II died in a bizarre freezer accident and was last seen thawing out under Carter Hunts car at VIR. Wolfgang III contracted rabies on a MLT field trip to Mexico, where the team had travelled to buy wardrobe items.
Cash should be sent in leiu of flowers to the MLT booze fund for Road Atlanta.
